10 cm.
Marriage, pregnancy, buying a new house, getting engaged, a relationship, I always hear, “I am just not ready”.
Let’s talk babies, for instance. It’s necessary to be financially, emotionally and physically secure to birth it, and take care of it. At least that’s what we believe. The idea of taking care of a baby sounds cute, but the more of an actuality building a family is, it’s frightening. Imagine- having to help guide and sustain a completely new personality in the most stable way to your knowledge. What was once thought as parents mistakes will feel so humanized, and finally see how helpless they were to a new life. I suddenly cling to everything I’m thankful they taught and want to relive it, to teach it again. At one point, I refused to take prenatal pills for a long time because even the word “natal” is jarring. I remember that point in my life when the idea of children wasn’t even an idea. This post is about the sudden awareness that babies are everywhere and I’m sort of wanting one lately. I just don’t think I’m ready.
Being ready makes brings security, knowing what the future will be like, where you will be, and who you will become. Marriage is even risky. We all know the stats, and getting married “so soon” (from what I’ve been told) was a gamble. I was so nervous at the idea of being in a relationship forever. It was worth the venture when I imagined my older days without Scott, even in those months we were getting to know each other.
I can barely guide my own way of living, and I may not feel ready, but the unexpected moments are the moments that make you suddenly apt to change diapers or carry a newborn. Of course nobody is financially, or emotionally ready to get married, or to have a baby, but why wait so long? The reality of it is, how long will it take to get ready? It doesn’t matter how long you wait, because ready will never be. I may feel secure in some areas, but others, I’m kicking and screaming with fear.
Dear readers, I’m not pregnant, but as I get older, looking at baby stuff, my ovaries start kicking a bit. On an emotional whim, I even subscribed to Pregnancy magazine. I won’t learn everything I need to know in a publication, but more by experience, but I’d like to think I’m going to be a little ready.
I don’t believe in a biological clock. I believe it’s the gusto to be able to finally show someone love the way our parents did, or to do it better. We may not feel ready, but real, true unconditional love is 10 centimeters.
<3
well, i definitely know what you mean about ovaries starting to kick. i definitely experience that…sometimes on a daily basis. having a new kitten is NOT making it any better. i totally agree with what you said about never being ready. for most people, there is never the best time to get pregnant. it's always a bit of a risk. i can't wait though!suuuuuper cute baby shots, btw!
The bookcase picture is freaking me OUT.
Oh, honey. I know what you mean about feeling pressured to move on to the next stage in your life, but not feeling "ready".Working in a baby store and being surrounded by pregnant bellies and mini-humans all day has convinced me that babies are a long way off, but I may have a bit of an upper hand given my experience with the gestating set. I love, love, LOVE the last line. So beautiful.
You are so clever. You know what, that is perfect how you are learning about pregnancy now. It's not an admission that you want to get pregnant, it's a case of someday you will be and you'd best be prepared. Like going to school to get a job! You're my hero!
I've been fascinated with babies my entire life. Probably because I never baby-sat. I bug my boyfriend about having kids pretty often these days, but it's only because I miss my dog!
I totally agree with what ana b. said!
I am just totallu agree with what you said.
haha so adorable! Cute little ones
Ahh, such cute pictures! You know Diana, you're right – we do have a lot of eerie similarities right now!!
I'm not pregnant either, but lately all I can think about is babies. I agree that it's best to try to be emotionally/financially ready, and it's so strange because I feel like I'm getting there — yesterday I even talked to my doctor about how we're considering trying for a baby in the next year or so. It feels so intensely strange to think about! I think talking about the possibility makes it more real, though – and research is a good idea. 
A couple of months ago I totally went on a quest to learn about cloth diapers. hahaha.
this is a beautiful post. i dont think we're ever "ready" to have babies. i think the time comes ad we just do the best we can.
Well, i'm not even married and i fantasize about having babies someday in the near future. I think people over-think it. They wait and wait and wait for what it seems to be the perfect moment to have a baby, and not that's not ok, but i rather let myself go with whatever that's going on in my life. It doesn't mean that i'm gonna try and get pregnant tomorrow, when i don't have a job and i'm still living at my parents house, but when the slight feeling that the moment is right, i'm sure i'll give it a go. I like it that you're getting prepared now, learning about pregnancy, even if you become a mom long from now. One will never feel prepared enough, but it's wise to at least take advantage of time.
I'm going through alot of the same thoughts and feelings as you too! I think for me it is about the enormous life altering change that it will have! It will be a wonderful thing but wow, its alot to think about sometimes
I don't think we can ever be fully "ready" but its good to be prepared.
you're right, we'll never be ready. being ready is something i think about often, ready for marriage, a family, life. i never feel ready. right now my dogs pacify my maternal instinct, hopefully that will last for a while!
Amazing!I love the hair in the second one. So cute.
Amazing!I love the hair in the second one. So cute.
Diana, I am loving your text posts lately! (Well, you know I love ALL of your posts but you know what I mean). I don't have any kids of my own yet, but I was pregnant once (I miscarried) and let me tell you…I was SO NOT READY. But at the same time, what constitutes "being ready?" I don't think there is really such a thing. Sure, there are those who are more financially/emotionally prepared but I believe that when it happens (or doesn't), it's for a reason.Plus you and Scott would make reallyreally cute behbeh's and I wanna see 'em. Haha.
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my ovaries are starting to kick too, but i think i've got a few years before i will want kids. i don't think i'll ever really be ready. it's just something i'll throw myself into head first and hope i don't screw the kid up too much.
A wonderful post. I love your thoughts on how we all think we should be so 'ready' for any kind of commitment. But the fact is, things don't always go as planned. You can never be truly ready for anything. And that means sometimes you just have to be brave and plunge.
Awww that bathtub photograph is so adorable! I think it is natural to get to that stage in your life where the possibility of having children becomes one you can really start to think about. And although it is hard work, I'm pretty sure there are not that many parent out there who would say it is not worth it. But you really have to be sure you are ready, both as a couple and yourself. Really do hope you're having a wonderful day
If you think about all the things it takes to be "ready," then you may ever really feel ready to do anything ever! But that knowledge of knowing that you may not have everything together but you sure as hell are going to try your darndest to do so is the bravest thing to do. Kudos!Thanks for sharing these adorable pictures!
it's like getting married… you're never going to be absolutely prepared you just have to take the plunge! when the time comes i'm sure it will feel absolutely right… i love that you are already doing research!
Truer words never spoken dear Diana. I read somewhere that one is never truly "ready" for a baby and that you just have to take the leap…such a leap though!!! It makes my head swim thinking about it!!
really nice stuff!and RE to comment you left me: oh haha there all digital actually :/ im too tight on money right now for film.
What a great post.I'm sometimes scared that I will never be ready, and I will let down my husband and family. The thought of the caring for another life is overwhelming. I'm still waiting for the kick of the ovaries. xoxo
oh, you are going to be one fabulous mom. i hope a little one (or more!) comes your way fairly soon. i can bet he or she would be loved, adored and very well photographed!
i love this post. i had my son at 20 and i was in NO WAY ready and it's the best best thing that ever could have happened.
yeh i feel like i need to grow up myself, i couldnt imagine looking after a baby, i would be scared.
I am way to young to even think about babies. They may be cute and all, but frankly, the whole shebang sounds terrifying. Those pictures are adorable though.-indigo
wow! the book case photos are a little bit weird. Though when i was a kid i used to sleep on my grandmas closet. I like to hide in there and lost track of time and i would fall asleep.
oh, wow, i absolutely love these…the first especially.
Awwwww! This post totally sounds like you're ready.Can't wait to see it all unfold.
OMG I almost shed a tear from this post…all I can say is – how wonderful Diana. You will be the best mom ever, whenever it happens..that is a definite.XOXO
I've always adored babies. I just met my cousin's 2 year old baby yesterday (who was very pleased with the toy I got him from Australia! So CUTE), and it does make me think about how much I'd want to have children too. but then reality sinks it, and I'm not even ready to have a relationship, let alone get married and have a family.
Can I say the kid in the sunglasses was so adorable.
I'm in love with this post. Everything is so beautifully stated and I admire you for what you say about how nobody's really ready but it's the unconditional lurve we will ultimately give to a child.Also, I think it's adorable (although, I'm sure it's not meant to be! I just find it to be) that you subscribed to Pregnancy magazine. It can't hurt to be a little prepared.
sometimes i think it is best for nature to take it's course…
I'm totally in love with these images…how cute!Cheers: Evi
That last lines says it all. There is nothing more unconditional than a mom's love!
aww the cutest ever!! Love these photos of such adorable little ones!!
I feel the Same